I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize