That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
