I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
