Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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