I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
