Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Randomize
