Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Randomize
