There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
