I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
