you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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