Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
