She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
