return my video game
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
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