erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
