he puts the penis in happiness.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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