found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
And then the night went full on bisexual.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
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