I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I just found puke in my bra..
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize