In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Randomize
