Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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