i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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