Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
