You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
