i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
