i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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