Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
I should be sponsored by Trojan
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
