Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
