so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
