Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
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