My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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