After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Randomize
