he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
