At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
