you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
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