You're so nebulous sometimes
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
