would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize