You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Drunk walkin through police station. America
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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