xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
