p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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