i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
