Yo dont text me then not text me
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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