Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
What drink are we having for lunch?
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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