do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
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