Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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