I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
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