you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
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