We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
