The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Randomize
