A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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