my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
