Already got asked if we're dating
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
