ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
