My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Dicks are not precious.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Randomize
